The Art of Bad Service

This rant may be a bit long, but take some time to read it, because this will give you a VERY GOOD idea of the kind of service/after-service to expect, especially if you work from home.

This could be an imaginary you in some form or another: Firstly, you think that, ***, since I'm working from home anyway, I'm going to go live in some secluded place in the beauty of nature. You find this place of wonder, looks good, but soon find out that no regular internet connection would suffice here. Ah! Morclick to the rescue, offering a package just perfect for you - 20 mbps download, and 3 mbps upload. They even advertise it as a meetings package, perfect for people who work from home. Price seems a bit steep, but hey, totally worth it being out here in the middle of nowhere, bit of peace and quiet. They do lock you into a 2-year contract with exorbitant cancellation fees, should you decide not to use their services anymore. But hey, worth it. OK then. Perfect! Just what you need for all those conference calls you make for your online job. You fill out the application form, and voila - within seconds there's a sales person in touch with you organizing and finalizing the installation. Great! These people are REALLY on the ball, you think. Installation done. Internet connection is fine. Works OK for a while. You do think though, it's kind of weird that they send you about 5 reminders a month to make sure you know about their debit order that will go off your bank account, especially since no other companies you have debit orders with do this. Also kinda strange since you've never missed a payment.

Then they have a beam migration where they start using a new satellite for your connection from Frankfurt. It doesn't take long before you realize that, in your calls, you now sometimes have to ask clients to please switch off their videos for the call to work. The times there are video, there's a 4 or 5 second audio lag which have you and the other participants in the meeting talking over each other all the time. Don't even think about trying to share a YouTube video. Now the video in Teams freezes. There's a few clouds in the sky here in South-Africa, it's raining in Frankfurt. All of a sudden the meeting cuts out. You can't get back in. Five people, somewhere in Europe, are wondering why you've suddenly disappeared from the meeting. These clients are nice, though, and say, 'Don't worry. Probably a technical glitch' But when these technical glitches happen the 5th time in a row, you can see, these people aren't being as accommodating as they used to be. You start losing clients. YOU START LOSING MONTHLY INCOME. You look on the self-service site, and there it is - the graph which clearly shows how your upload speeds barely make a notch on the graph compared to before the beam migration.

You get in touch with Morclick for technical assistance the only way you can get in touch with them - via WhatsApp. You're put in touch with a "technician" who is going to help you. Day 1: You tell him about the technical issues you have experienced. He runs you around in circles and keeps telling you there's nothing wrong. You think, well, ok, let's try to stay patient. Maybe these kinks will work themselves out. But they don't. The docket is still open, so you push onwards with the "technician". Day 2: Some more running around in circles. You're starting to get a bit gatvol. The "technician" senses this and says he will elevate the case. Day 3: The "technician" comes back to you and gives you this from Morclick's higher powers. Activity Description: 'We have checked the RF stats of the site; all parameters are good and up to the mark. Speed test results are as per service offering.' You're thinking to yourself, 'per service offering'? My package promises upload speeds of up to 3 mbps (what you need for a Teams meeting), but on the self-service portal, it barely registers above 1 mbps when I do a speedtest. Day 4: Pushing onwards with the "technician". More circles. He asks you if you want him to elevate this case to management. You say, 'Yes, please. You've asked me already. I was under the impression that you've done this.' Day 5: You get this message once again: Activity Description: 'We have checked the RF stats of the site; all parameters are good and up to the mark. Speed test results are as per service offering.' You can see the stalling tactics here, right? You ask the technician to please close your chat. Not once, but twice. Let's at least AFTER FIVE ****ING DAYS, try to see if there's another "technician" who could maybe help you more fruitfully. Of course, you don't use expletives. But you surely think this. Ask him again. Please close our chat. He ignores you. He suspects there may be some bad feedback coming his way. So, now, there's NO OTHER WAY for you to get in touch with Morclick, simply because the "technician" refuses to close the chat. And he knows this. Day 6: On Day 6, some more circles, and you can see "technician" hopes you'll tire yourself out evetually and go away.

So, what's become clear to me is them making sure they get your business (very efficient pre-installation service and installation service) and making sure you keep paying your monthly installments (all those ****** notifications). Providing actual service during your interim with them? No so high on their lists of to-do. Also, once you get stuck with a "technician" who cannot help, you're staying in purgatory hell. The only thing the "technician" worries about is getting a good rating. Anything other than a good rating will affect their performance scores which in turn reflects THEIR monthly salary. Nevermind that the customer is losing revenue because of ***** connection!!!!!!!!! They'll refuse to close the chat which leaves you with no other recourse.

So, I suggest telling them that eveyrthing is GREAT anyway, give them a bad score, and then try another "technician". From what I've heard from my installer, some "technicians" are better than others.

Please, people, if you are having problems with these people because of false advertising, get in touch with NCC (The National Consumer Commission) and the ARB (The Advertising Regulatory Board).

And now, cue the generic reply of commiseration from Morclick, all concern, so eager to help. I bet you nothing comes from that.