Standard Bank has broken me in half

I honestly do not know where else to turn, and I am writing this while crying because I feel completely exhausted, defeated, and unseen.

I was retrenched last year. I immediately informed Standard Bank of my situation, because I wanted to do the right thing. I had taken out insurance on my loan, and I was approved for that insurance.

But life happened in the most devastating way.

At the same time as losing my income, I was caregiving for my mother as she was dying. There was no way I was mentally or physically able to simply “move on” and find work while trying to survive that reality.

After she passed away, it was December. I told myself I would start again. I would search. I would rebuild. But finding work has been incredibly difficult.

Right now, I survive on UIF and the support of my sister, who helps me with food and housing. My UIF is reducing every month, and the reality is becoming more frightening.

Then something happened that has pushed me even further into crisis.

I assisted with a freelance project and received R7 000. I paid R6 000 of that to the technical person involved because I did not want to take advantage of someone’s work or leave them unpaid.

Standard Bank then debited my account and took what they could.

On top of this, a Telkom debit order that was written off seven years ago was restarted, pushing my account into delinquency.

I am now sitting here knowing I cannot even put the remaining for bounced debit order fee of R600 into the account because I need that money to buy electricity and try to cover my municipal account.

I am trying to keep my lights on.

I am trying to survive.

The part that hurts the most is that Standard Bank approved the insurance on my loan, yet I feel like the system is still crushing me.

I am not refusing to pay.

I have continued trying. I even sc**** together R150 every month towards my credit card because I am trying to honour my responsibilities, even when that money could literally buy me electricity units or cover basic needs.

I opened my Standard Bank account in 2001 as a student. I have been loyal for over two decades. My retrenchment was not a choice. My mother’s illness and passing were not choices.

I am asking for compassion, a review, and someone to actually look at my situation as a person and not just a delinquent account.

Because behind this account is someone trying desperately to stand back up.

Right now, I feel broken.

I just need someone at Standard Bank to hear me.