STANDARD BANK CALL CENTRE FOUND WANTING - BADLY!

As a long-standing Standard Bank customer, I believe something needs to be done about its call centre personnel and complaint resolution process. Here's one reason why.

On 22 January 2023, when I tried to use internet banking to raise my EAP limit and transfer money elsewhere urgently, the following message popped up in a red banner:

'Your request could not be processed at the moment. To continue with this action, you'll need to link your device to your profile on the app' (their poor use of English, not mine) (suggestion: 'Sorry, but we can't process your request right now' would be better)

And here's the thing: I don't use the app because I don't need to. I do all my internet banking on my laptops (I have two, which I alternate). I never, ever use my phone for internet banking.

I then tried to transfer money from one account to another, at which point a new banner appeared. This time, it was yellow and said:

'You don't have any accounts to transfer between' (their poor use of English, not mine) (suggestion: Oops! We seem to have a problem. Sorry about that. Please try again later when we've investigated what went wrong)

I eventually decided to log out in the hope that, if I logged back in, the system would correct itself. It didn't. Instead, it got worse. A service error appeared in a white banner on a blue background saying:

'The service is currently unavailable. Please try again later, while we investigate' (their poor use of English, not mine) (suggestion: Apologies for the inconvenience. Please try again later. Meanwhile, we'll investigate what went wrong) (no use trying during the investigation, surely?)

It took twelve days for me to get back into internet banking on one of my laptops. I don't dare fiddle again with the other (a trusty workhorse). As a journalist, I use it to keep clients happy and food on the table. It works perfectly and is treated with the respect it deserves ...

Here's the process I followed in my efforts to resolve the problem ...

As soon as it arose, I sent an email to the bank's complaint resolution centre. I then contacted the call centre, whose agent insisted that the only way to solve the problem would be to upload the app on my phone.

Even if I wanted to use the bank's app, I can't. It's for mobile devices. I have an entry level not-so-smart 'smart phone', which serves its purpose well by allowing me to make and receive calls and access WhatsApp. I don't need the banking app. Neither do I want it.

Although I've since discovered that - even if I did want to use the app on my phone - going through the uploading process takes so long the bank's system becomes impatient and cuts me off with a message saying 'insufficient activity' or some such. So, it's not as if I haven't tried ...

Alas, my attempts at explaining all this to the call centre agent were either misunderstood or fell on deaf ears.

So, I demanded (angrily, I confess) to speak to her manager.

Fortunately for the bank, he called immediately but was unable to resolve the issue. Apparently, my account showed no signs of dysfunction or irregularity. He nevertheless promised to consult the IT unit for advice.

At which point I need to make absolutely sure you know that I have no gripe with the call centre manager. He did his best, contacting me regularly by phone and email to update me about what was being done to fix the problem.

Eventually, one of the bank's IT personnel called to suggest various options he hoped would point to the source of the problem. I have no gripe with him either, by the way.

But unfortunately, nothing he suggested helped. I took my workhorse laptop to a Wi-Fi hotspot to see if I could use internet banking there and couldn't. So, he suggested I take it to the bank's nearest branch for help. That was on 3 February - a Friday, which is especially busy for me.

Not relishing the thought of my workhorse laptop being prodded and probed by bank personnel on a Saturday morning (sorry, no offence, but ... ), on the evening of Friday 3 February I decided to uninstall and reinstall Microsoft Office.

At the call centre manager's suggestion, I had already cleared cookies and caches on both laptops (just in case you're wondering). I had also inserted a special URL into a setting that keeps the bank's cookies on a laptop when it shuts down (I did this on both devices). But desperate times call for desperate measures ... So, I reset my non-workhorse laptop and went through the whole rigmarole once again.

Successfully!

'Voila!' - I eventually managed to get back into internet banking twelve days after the problem arose - on one laptop. As I've already written, I don't want to mess around anymore with the workhorse.

But guess what? When I finally got into my bank account and tried to increase my EAP, the same red banner popped up! Followed by the same yellow one when I attempted an inter-account transfer!

So, I sent the IT man and the call centre manager screenshots - attached to an email saying I had at long last succeeded in accessing internet banking and would therefore not need to take my laptop to the nearest branch as suggested.

Sadly, my emails were ignored.

Yes, I did become extremely angry with the call centre agent. Yes, I also experienced intermittent difficulty in accessing Gmail during the time it took to resolve the problem. Yes, one other account was affected (Vodacom's, which is another story worthy of another review another day).

Yes, as I've already written, I do alternate between two laptops (only one of them now allows me to access internet banking, but hey, who's complaining?).

Perhaps the bank's (and Vodacom's) system thinks that laptop's a smart phone?

Whatever ... There was an indisputable problem with my internet banking account for which no apology has been made. It hasn't even been acknowledged. And I have screenshots of the banners. They weren't a figment of my imagination.

Eish!