NEDBANK WOODLANDS INSULTING & USELESS

That's 2 hours of my life I'll never get back! In the 42 years that I have banked with Nedbank, 3 bonds and a Gold Business account over this time, after todays "service", seems it's at least one day too many!. Shocked. Unable to access my accounts electronically on Saturday, Sunday and this morning, I tootled off to Nedbank Woodlands for help as month end is upon me and much to do, need to sort this out ASAP. Upon arrival, I was greeted by the ticket number receptionist, E00013 ticket number. Two customer service reps at the counter, 3 customers waiting for service. 40 minutes later, it's finally my turn. Yahoo. That was a premature Yahoo. For about 15 minutes, the server was unable to remedy the problem. He shouts across the banking hall to the the ticket number employee at the door to assist me. She escorts me back to the banking hall waiting area to a random table. Having struggled for about another 10 minutes, during which time she runs between me and the ticket number machine, I was still unable to rectify the problem. So I waited for her to return to assist me, and I waited....and waited. I overheard another very unhappy business man customer complaining that Nedbank don't answer their phones and he could have been assisted telephonically, as could I possibly. I called Nedbank from the banking hall *** (Google). 10 minutes later my call is taken, I ask to be transferred to Woodlands branch manager, thinking I'll try and dig her out of her burrow. After listening to 10 minutes of marketing lies, my call is put through to complaints department. Complaints told me to send them an email. REALLY? Perhaps I sounded too calm :( I tell the complaints dept what the situation is and I would like to see the branch manager. He informs me to tell the ticket number lady to call a team leader. Now they're recruiting me! I take my phone to ticket lady who ignores me, I present her with my phone and request she speak to complaints dept. She puts the phone down on her desk in front of her keyboard and continues focusing on the screen. I ask her to please speak to Nedbank complaints rep who is on the line. Ticket lady talks to complaints dept. in a language which I don't understand but pick up "team leader". Ticket lady says, without taking her eyes from her screen, informs me she will take me to branch manager. I wait, and I wait, ...and wait while she continues to issue tickets to 4 more people coming in the door, while I wait. After 10 minutes of waiting again, I felt I had to leave for fear of losing it in the bank. I have been trying to transfer significant funds from Business Cheque account to my bond (3rd bond with Nedbank) at significantly higher interest rates than a cheque account for several days, unsuccessfully. Losing interest (significant amount of money), 2 hours of my time at going rate of R3K/hour. (I'm a Professional) Why do I bank with them? Really? I'm not not able to gain access to my accounts and fully intend to close ALL my accounts, post haste. Cheers Nedbank. I hear Capitec is amazing and charge 10% of what Nedbank charges. Loyalty is a self depreciating attitude. Get a dog!