I expect more from my bank

I would like to change this rating. I really want to.

This Nedbank comedy of errors started on or about 31 January 2019.

Today I discovered that the Nedbank horror of errors would be a more apt description. I’ll keep my comments and my sincere request brief and not to incriminate any bank officials, I will refer to branches and individuals in neutral terms. All interactions, however, were recorded and have reference numbers.

On or about 30 January 2019 I requested some investments to mature because I wanted to rather make use of new generation Nedbank investment vehicles with a better yield. I realised that I would have to visit a branch to actually make sure that the accrued interest is at the same time transferred to my transactional account and that I can only close those accounts at a branch, since I would no longer be using them.

So, I did visit Branch A on or about 31 January 2019 to facilitate the transfer of the accrued interest into my transactional account on 4 March 2019 at the latest. The first-line banker assisted me competently and I have had all the confidence in the world that what she said and after I had signed all the required documentation would happen today, 4 March 2019, at the latest.

Until today arrived. The interest is still stuck in the account where I don’t want it and the accounts are still open. Let alone the limit to the transferable online amount that no longer serves my purposes.

On my way to a rural area where I work during the week, I stopped at Branch B which is more conveniently situated on the road I had to travel.

When explaining to the first-line banker what went wrong and needed to be fixed, she profusely apologised for being offline at 12:00 on a Monday afternoon while the tellers were happily processing transactions without any sign of being offline. She comforted me by saying whatever she can do for me, any person at your general enquiry support centre would be able to do also.

So, I inconveniently and late for my travel arrangements went home to get things sorted out by phoning the support line. At 15:40 I gave up.

First support person after hearing the first of five things I needed done asked me to hold the line and after holding for a considerable amount of time, the landline call was dropped. Phoned again. We are experiencing high call volumes, please be patient. Second support person: Sorry, Sir. You will have to go into a branch to get that done. But the branch is offline, and they assured me whatever they can do, you could do better. Please hold while I consult with my manager. Long wait. Landline call got dropped again.

Phoned a third time. Same apology, longer waiting period. After hearing my sad story, support person three asked me to wait while she transferred me to a person who would be able to assist me. Longer wait. Landline call got dropped.

Phoned a fourth time. Fourth support person swallowed my rage and calmly listened to my sad, sad story. He confirmed that I could only have dome what I needed done at a branch. But the branch is offline, and they gave me every assurance that whatever they could do at the branch the support line could do better.

Very helpful despite my terse demeanour, support person four suggested that I call the branch manager at Branch A where the in-branch transaction had been concluded on or about 31 January 2019. He would have access to the paperwork and would then be able to facilitate the correction and saving me a visit to the branch for this one of five issues I had to resolve. He provided me with the name of the branch manager and also gave me all five landline numbers for the branch.

The phoning started at or about 15:00 to a branch that closes at 16:00. Number 1 rang and rang and rang and eventually turned into an engaged tone. Number 2 the same. Number three the same. Number four the same. Number five the same. Please be mindful that the monotony happened at a far, far slower pace.

Low and behold, call six to number one got answered after a lengthy period of time with the answer that the branch manager is busy and that he would call me back. Call was ended. Call me back? On what number? What if I preferred to hold on for him given what I explained above? All attempts to phone again went all unanswered.

And I still sit with five unresolved issues that require the intervention of a banker whose knowledge goes beyond opening and closing a transactional account.

My request: Instead of providing the unsolicited details of my pending maturing investments to a financial advisor, please provide me with the name and direct telephone number of a banker I can talk to who would attend to my issues. I am in the middle of nowhere until Friday afternoon. God forbit that I have to go through the same ordeal on Saturday morning while I am losing interested on capital that should have been by now in an account where I would be earning more interest.

I would prefer access to one person to whom I don’t have to explain the basics every time because I know full well that the person on the other side of the desk or the line might not be experienced enough to deal with the services I require.

Please. I do not have another three and a half hours to waste on thin air.