The easiest way to get an MTN SIM card - ***** it

A couple of weeks ago I realized that my cellphone is gone. MTN transferred my SIM card to a ****mer while I have been abroad. I'm amazed - for a SIM card I have to fill out a Rica form with ID-book and proof of residence. To ***** a SIM card, MTN offers self-service. When I complained, MTN asked for the card number which I submitted. After that, MTN stopped responding to my attempts. No number, no airtime, new business-cards, trouble with banking