Cell C SIM Swap of Death

Guys. GUYS. Don't. Just don't.

You know when I say that these people make simple things like SIM swaps a whole entire Mission Impossible: Tokyo Drift- because yo ass will be drifting from store to care line to store to care line just to get one simple easy-peasy sim swop completed!

So let's just say you get a Cell C sim card because you like the colour red and you enjoyed that "You can talk for FREE" advert from 2005. All good in the hood. You set up your Whatsapp. You use it as a primary contact number for all possible future husbands. You link it to your cellphone banking because hey, issa vibe. Life's good with Cell C and you're living large.

KANTI then plot twist: your phone gets ******, SIM card and all. Gone PHA disappeared Gone With The Wind: South African Petty Crime edition. Okay cool, so the you're like lemme do a simple and easy-peasy SIM swap so I get to keep the phone number even if my phone is gone.

YOOOOOOOOHHHHHH. Here comes Dante's Inferno level of flames. Cell C's Customer Care will ask you a RoccoMama's menu examination juuuuuuuust to get a SIM swap. Like your SIM is evidence of Gupta dealings. Like your SIM is the treasure Nicolas Cage looking for in the White House. Now you may say I'm being dramatic but let's just discuss for 10 marks:

'If you lost your phone: do you remember such things like the last 5 numbers you dialed (numbers, not names, and remember your phonebook is gone with the phone), the last DATE AMOUNT and MANNER of recharge, the number you dial most often, where Perry The Platypus gets his hats, why men cheat on good women, the reason for elaichi in biryani, who is Palesa on your mans Instagram follow list..."

Ya neh. It's good to note that I had a dual SIM phone and even Telkom the Terrible helped me faster than Cell C and the Encrypted Secrets of The World. If in the miracle of Jesus interceding on my behalf (He'd probably need to provide 3 months bank statement and proof of residence tho), my ass is switching networks QUICKETY QUICK because I'm getting too old to keep up with the CIA that is Cell C.

All I'm tryna say is that it's not that deep guys. Sometimes **** happens. Can we just give our ID number and make the things to make the pots to be done. I mean it's a unique identification number that links to the active account, no? Come now guys. Lets know our place. Cell C is the security guard of networks that tries to act like a cop. I just want my internet banking to work sis. Can we just?