Greyhound - We are not responsible for whatever happens on your journey because we preoccupied, incapacitated and well, damn, we just don't give!

For my 6th wedding anniversary I planned a trip to CPT via bus to see some place I don't foresee visiting. Found in July that stops in 11 towns. A sure sign was learning that Elo Coaches is selling Greyhound tickets, but I was dead set on my plan and had communicated to my wife and peers. 4 ticketing centers later, I finally booked online. All centers and supermarkets were offline - It was clearly my aura cautioning me.

29th October comes, preparation, good byes to my young family and park the car at a commercial building to catch a bus at Park Station.

The nightmare started with a 2 hour wait for a bus until a message rang, that read "Greyhound are in collaboration with Citiliner....". I think noting of it as Greyhound is the first class of bus coaches and wouldn't surrender their standard. LOL. I found myself comforting my wife about a bus no one was communicating about, just a pocket full of hope.

We embark and faintly heard a mumbled speech from an A-hole bus driver named Thomas. He was a light-skinned Tsonga man whom I would later promise to slap. His then response to an elder woman was, "Only ask about this bus and not the bus you booked. We don't choose busses, we just drive what we get. If this bus is not to your liking, disembark and go to the office. This bus is of a lesser quality than you paid for bus no refunds will be given regardless!". If this is was not a "private parts" response, I do not know what is.

Bus takes off and I am dead set on my plan. We pass nearby towns and I definitely see the landscape, much more than when driving in my sports coupe. By this time I have gotten used to the pungent smell and the faulty air-conditioning. 1,5 hours into the trip the bus driver makes an emergency stop following some buzzing sound.

The 2 drivers jump off and open the back of the bus. They subsequently switch off the bus and again they disappear to the rear. The stuffiness in the bus forces a few people to disembark. As a person on an expedition I noticed that those that disembarked generally spoke fluent English, carried smartphones, and had some work or business undertaking at their destination. One guy was apologizing to his new employer where Sunday was his first day.

Soon after, the elderly and sickly begin to jump off just setting up on the grass. New mothers sat in dangerous sections of the highway with their infants such that other people cautioned them. The evident foreign nationals were jovial alerting their loved ones of this mishap. I think it got real when a well built man became inconsistent and being to collapse. Another lady asked for her sister to sit on our throw blanket because she hadn't her diabetes medication on her and was fast losing energy. It was a scene from a horror movie.

Where was Thomas, far across the road standing by himself. The other drive trying to crack humor for calm and saying that they haven't a response but if HQ decides then they will send a mechanic. I think by that time, we had lost 6 hours to undue delays. Finally a tiny mechanic comes to our aid removing one bolt from one component to secure another component. Some university students and myself were not pulling the hard parts for the mechanic because he was literally too tiny for the job.

It was at that time that some ladies were hysterical, complaining about transport at their destinations and hunger that Thomas said, "He doesn't care. It's not his bus and he doesn't check the busses after leaving the depot because if he does he may be fired for not wanting to work or complaining". I told him to shut up or I would slap him because he is making the matter worse. I proposed that the other guy maybe just keep quiet because he was now laughing at any excuse he made - its a common reaction to embarrassment but he was aggravating the matter including setting off some lady who just blasted gospel music on her Bluetooth speaker. The men calm the nonsense down.

Thomas drove off with a bus that some passengers were decanted into. He later joined the trip around Stellenbosch. He other driver was hospital and managed to win over the ladies who had become a nuisance to everyone.

For a bus that was destined to reach CPT at 06:05 we arrived at midday. I lost a booking for a boat cruise at V&A, 3 hours at a 5 star apartment forcing a late check-in after I specifically pleaded for an early one, and a day spa treatment. I know you know cancellation terms and conditions. We literally lost a day of site seeing. I now had to doctor my wife because of swollen feet. The next 3 days were just disorientated from the distasteful start to the trip cause by Greyhound. Whilst I would still like to create a better bus trip memory for myself, my wife swore to never get on a bus again. Thanks for a terrible chapter and story for our kids. We flew back to GP after 4 days at The Yatch Club at the Quays.

I would like an apology and a compensation for my money lost.