Why is closing my account so difficult

PLEASE JUST CLOSE MY ACCOUNT OR DOWNGRADE IT.

It has been weeks if not months and after countless "I'm putting your request through" my account is still not closed. Absolutely pathetic, as I'm still expected to pay my bank fee when I haven't been using my FNB account for months now. You claim to be one of the best banks, but your processes for simple things are not so smooth.