FNB Won't close paid up account

I've been trying to close a paid up account for over two months, no success. I've visited a branch multiple times, spoken to more agents than I can mention via telephone, emailed numerous times, been transferred everywhere (no one seems to know who can help me), waited an advised 45 days (max), another 7 business days (max), escalated the issue multiple times, logged 2 official complaints (zero response, btw), logged a complaint with the banking ombudsman, still no help being offered.

Terrible service.