FNB refuses to close my account

I moved to Standard Bank last year and was told I could not close my FNB account because of a device I have with them. Apparently they do not want the debit order to go off from my new account, so I kept the account open. Now I'm noticing that payments fail and then they deduct over R100 because the payment failed (even though there was money in the account). Plus I'm paying R150pm for an account I'm not using. They also locked my savings account as part of the promotion they had on the device I bought with them. I could get it at a cheaper rate IF I keep my ebucks level and IF I lock R1500 on my savings account. I conveniently lost my ebucks level the very next month so I'm paying the normal rate now (not convenient actually). Can they not use my savings account to pay off the device since that feature is not available to me (apparently I am forced to pay it off over a period of time so they can make more money). Point is, I want to get rid of the FNB account completely because I really don't want to have to pay another company R150pm when I don't need to. Please close my FNB account already! I moved to Standard Bank because you are so insanely expensive and because Standard Bank offered me a bond rate of 4% less than you when I was buying my house. Please, please please pretty please close my account already and use my savings account to pay off my device or at least set up a debit order that links to my new account. I'll even give you the device back. I'm not using it anyway. I just took it because you said I can have it for free (which was only valid for a month since you conveniently dropped my ebucks level from level 5 to 2).