FNB Business Account Nightmare | A disappointment to fellow South Africans

find it unfortunate that I find myself writing a bad review on a Friday but “it is what it is” as they say.

After being reminded numerous times that I had received an email about documentation required in order to open and activate my business account and after apologising for my oversight I then realised that the contents of this email must be a state secret because it took another 30 minutes of my life to be thrown into the abyss of futility while on hold to be told that the company reg cert is needed COR14.3. I sent this through on the 30th of April to *** (and sent it again on the 4th of May). I was assured that activation should be less than 2 business days, seems plausible right? One document right?

My fellow South Africans, it is the 7th of May and after numerous calls and requests for escillation I still have a shinny new business account on my profile showing the exact quotient of how much service I have received from FNB and amount the amount of promises that have been fulfilled = 0. I personally believe that speaking to any fellow human being and treating them with the respect and dignity that I would like to receive has served me well thus far because we are all trying to figure this life thing out I guess and we all need a break sometimes but alas… Despite my philosophy and approach, my pleas and appeals to have the account activated by yesterday were met with apathy and shoulder shrugging as well as the obligatory customer tennis that they play with you by passing you around to the various departments causing you to have to repeat your story over and over.

I would like everyone to know that I have honestly tried but this is ridiculous. I want to start a business in order to generate income for myself and create opportunities for my fellow South Africans and contribute to this beautiful country that is our South Africa but FNB clearly has better things to do than help South African’s help themselves like contacting you while you are waiting for your account to actually become useful in order to sell you more of what you don’t really need. Yes, the marketing department called me yesterday to do that and obviously I got the usual sorry and they waved the escalation carrot in front of me as they do.

To the FNB PR person reading this, please, don’t “escalate” anything further or tell me about the due process required because whatever process is being followed does not work. I don't have a reference number because I really didn't think that this would be something that would take longer than 2 days. I will be closing the (still inactive) account and most likely be moving all of my personal business to another bank in the future. It’s really not something that I was wanting to do but I see this standard of service, while apparently acceptable to FNB is not what I expect of a bank saying that they are committed to customer service and the other things that they think customers want to hear.

So in summary, FNB will open your business account in a flash but you are on your own with the rest my fellow South Africans. Don’t let the convenience fool you, when you REALLY need support, be prepared to have “on hold marketing” etched into your subconscious as you contemplate the processes that make an otherwise simple process unnecessarily complicated as the airtime on your phone and balance on your bank account (for “services rendered”) evaporate before your eyes because as we all know, the customer always pays, don’t they?

I wish you all good health and luck with your decisions as I share with you the fruits of mine.