ONLY BANK NOT WILLING TO NEGOTIATE SETTLEMENT

My husband and I have three accounts totalling R430,988. The actual amount borrowed is less than half of this amount. Monthly interest is R2111 and insurance is R1465. After the death of our son, my other son has paid all debts except these three. We are under debt review. Offered R230,000 in full and final settlement of these accounts, but African Bank will not bend their rules, as the accounts are in arrears. Know that a bank is not human, but the people working there are and surely have a discretion. Only solution, take these debts with us to our graves?