ABSA cannot get their Online Banking right

I am so tired of trying to use my ABSA online banking - problems every single time. I was told that my User name is the card number I had 5 years ago (now inactive) and when I use it with my password I ONCE AGAIN cannot log in. BUT, the real kicker is that I am given instructions on how to contact Support from ZAMBIA as if I am trying to log in from ZAMBIA. Hello, I am a South African citizen sitting at my desk in Johannesburg. For goodness sake, the minutes of my life are ticking by and I have to waste them on this nonsense.