ABSA Bank - Identity Theft

Dearest ABSA Bank. I Richard Steenkamp would like to thank you for completely ruining my financial life. It would appear that I have numerous bonds, credit cards and loans with ABSA Bank. I love the way you do credit checks and how you did fingerprint Identification to verify my identity to the amount of R4 000 000.00 bad debt as per Transunion (this includes credit cards, mortgages, and various other debts) I thank you from the bottom of my heart for *****ing up my credit record as per Transunion and ruining my life defeating any changes that I could make any further debt. I am however proud to say that you have managed to verify and to security check massive amounts off debt on my salary witch would never qualify for above debt. You have also verified and security checked my address as per Transunion records witch is incorrect; as I have lived at the same residential address for 20 years. According to ABSA Bank and Transunion records I have 3 different residential addresses all verified and on my personal record. Thank you ABSA Bank we so look forward to you *****ing up our future. Your sincerely Richard Steenkamp.